THREE FORCES THAT SHAPE CHARACTER

Charisma may be useful in attracting a following, but it is largely useless when it comes to achieving a long-term, positive impact on the people and organizations we lead. For this, we need character. Effective leadership is an inside-out job.

In helping people build their platforms, I often meet individuals whose public image is better developed than their personal character. People are one person on stage and another when the spotlight is off. It is this fundamental lack of integrity that undermines their effectiveness and, left unchecked, can destroy their legacy.

This is why it is so important to give attention to developing our character. Yes, talent is important. So is education and experience. But in the end, it is our character that makes or breaks us. In my lifetime, character has been shaped by three forces. If we want to develop our character, we need to give attention to each of them.

1. The Input We Consume. Computer geeks are fond of saying, “garbage in, garbage out.”  The same is true with our inner life. One of the best ways to grow is by reading books, listening to podcasts and other audio programs, and attending conferences. But the opposite is also true. Watching endless hours of television, viewing pornography, or mindlessly ingesting the worst of popular culture, erodes character.

This is why we must be attentive to the input we consume. It affects us in deep and profound ways. It is the raw material out of which our character is formed.

2. The Relationships We Pursue. Jim Rohn taught that “you are the average of the five people yo u spend the most time with.” If this is true - and I believe it is - we have to be more intentional about the people we choose to associate with.

o If you want to lose weight, hang out with people who make good diet and exercise choices. 

o If you want a better marriage, socialize with people who have healthy ones.

o If you want to make more money, associate with people who are successful.

Conversely, dissociate from people who reinforce your worst traits. Even the Bible warns, “Bad company corrupts good character” (see 1 Corinthians 15:33). None of us can afford relationships that pull us down.

3. The Habits We Acquire. These are simply the consistent ways we think, speak, and act in different situations. They are largely unconscious, which is what gives them their power - both positively and negatively. Good habits lead to good outcomes:

o If we develop the habit of praising our spouse in public, for example, it contributes to a healthy marriage. 

o If we develop the habit of positive thinking, it can help us cope with adversity.

o If we make healthy food choices, it can increase our energy, improve our productivity, and extend our lives.

But bad habits can have the opposite impact, too. If you make a habit of complaining about your boss, it can come back to bite you. That’s why we have to be intentional about building good habits and breaking ourselves of bad ones.

Nothing is more important to our effectiveness as leaders than the cultivation of our own character. Why? Because ultimately we will replicate who we are - for good or for bad.

Which of these three forces do you need to give attention to at this stage in your development as a leader? Tell us your experience!

WHO SAID NICE GUYS ALWAYS FINISH LAST?

We’ve all read the stories about successful and iconic CEOs with volatile personalities about leaders who use fear to drive performance, like Mr. Burns in The Simpsons, ruling over the Springfield power plant with an iron fist.

A few of these executives are better known for their bad behavior than their business achievements. And while in some cases their antics may be their downfall, many others go unpunished by their boards and shareholders as long as they’re delivering results.

The theatrics of badly behaved business leaders provide a constant stream of headlines for the media, so you couldn’t blame people for thinking that such aggressive behavior is a routine part of being a successful CEO. Sadly, we seldom read about the many mild-mannered but equally – if not more – effective executives. About those who foster commitment, loyalty, and inspiration. Maybe they’re not as newsworthy, but they’re certainly the ones we should be taking notes from.

So what can they teach us? In my 17 year career, I’ve known every kind of executive, from the most outrageous to the most gracious. And I keep coming back to five traits, which, in my view, are shared by the most inspirational and most effective among them:

1. Inclusive leaders commit to diversity

They use the insights brought by different people from different walks of life to spark discussion and create innovative solutions. They seek to build consensus and commitment, yet they don’t shy away from making the tough decisions.

Forget any notion that inclusion is simply a Human Resource initiative: a survey of executives conducted by Forbes identified workplace diversity as a major driver of internal innovation and business growth.

2. Creative leaders encourage employees to take risks

Their companies place a high value on innovation and often lead their industries as a result. Creative leaders cut through hierarchy and empower even the most junior team members to speak their mind. They create a culture which is energizing to be part of.

Innovative businesses are the most sought after by potential recruits. According to a survey of Millennials by Deloitte, 78% consider how innovative a company is when deciding if they want to work there.

3. Ethical leaders have the highest standards

They lead by example and serve as role models for transparency and openness. The companies they lead have a clear and defined societal purpose beyond profit. Their employees feel they’re making a difference in the world.

Ethical leadership is possibly the most important of all the five traits, as it underpins all the others. A leader can spend decades building their career and reputation only to have it destroyed by one scandal or lapse in judgment.

4. Balanced leaders don’t keep employees chained to their desks

They know long hours don’t necessarily improve productivity and profitability, and in fact can be counterproductive. They embrace the flexibility technology has provided the workplace, despite its ability to keep us connected 24/7. Balanced leaders aren't afraid to unplug for a few hours or even a few days.

I believe it’s really important for a leader to take time to disconnect. For example, I might travel to three countries in a week, but I’ll block out the weekend to spend time with my two sons and my wife. Or an evening for dinner with friends, or an event for the nonprofits I work with.

5. Grateful leaders are never too busy to say “thank you”

They remain grounded, stay human, and never forget where they came from. These leaders create a culture where people are recognized and valued for their contribution. They don’t just acknowledge the department heads or top sales people, but also those unassuming people behind the scenes, maybe the ones who make their coffee, or deliver their packages, or record their videos.

Gratitude is something that’s very important to me personally. In the past I’ve found many small but meaningful ways to say thank you, including personal letters and company awards.

Every CEO is different, and none of us are perfect, but the most effective and inspiring fall into one, several, or all of these groupings.

By a wide margin, these leaders will get the least press, even though they far exceed in numbers their peers with volatile personalities. Regardless, through the strong example they’re setting, they’re increasing customer loyalty, attracting the brightest talent to their companies, and inspiring the next generation of leaders.

Would you like to tell us your own experience?